August 31st 2018

Happy Birthday, to me.

Hello there my future self, here i am your 21 self. 

Been failed on relationship twice(this past years), still working on my skripsi, and my life.

Dad is sick, im at hospital now, been here for a week already with mom, lung cancer 4th stage they said.. cause it's already affect the other organs and we're about doing chemo for next few weeks perhaps, because operation won't be a wise choice..

I hope he can stand the treatment bcs many said chemo on his age like this just gonna make him suffer.. 

we don't know, we just try our best and let's Allah decides.

Don't cry, 

 i know

we just can't hold the tears that streaming down our face

Your life stage

So.. they said it's stage 4 cancer ?

Sunday, August 19th

Been 3days already we're in hospital. After many suffering from home, he'd finally deal to go.

From piles, diabetes, bone loss, and finally we got here. Lung cancer.

No it said to be just tumor first.

From ct-scan and many rontgens, they concluded that it had been spreading so that's why he got the bone loss and that suffers, and that 4th stage thing.

Pretty surprised.

He didn't smoke. Didn't have that coughing things while he sick lately. But who knows that it all been there all this time ?

"We cannot do the operation due his late age"

alright, i can see where it goes.

also can read: sorry he's too old already and the cancer already in the peak, the operation just wasting money and time and let just pray, do the herbal medication etc etc and hope for the best.

btw what i know until this morning just tumor, i got that 4th cancer thing from my mom's convo with her friend. yea sorry, i accidentally read it.

so here i am, and family, hoping for the best as everyone do.