It's sad, but it must be done.

So I can say that it's over now, after almost a year. But almost is never enough, isn't it?

We've been through so much, especially the fight. Our ego are just too big that we can't keep it ourselves. Same things happen and it's just like the Ferris wheel, going on and on and on. There's a time when it stopped, but not long after its continued all over again. Just like we never learned, aren't we?

My mind going on too much in this, i had this ciao feeling like everytime I can't stand it anymore on every battle but i just kept it. Now it has reached its peak, so I just click the enter on our chat room hoping that there will be no regrets.

I don't know what will happen to us for then, but I do hope the best for you. Be the best version of you, thankyou for everything that you've done, we do know we still got the feeling. Now it's the battle ground for ourselves, take care.

For you who might never read this, pba.

Okay, so my emotionally post last January is not valid on this one lol:p

Hm where do i have to started... He just came in to my life, tried to knock the frozen door, dare his self to crawl in to a dark-empty house which has been abandoned for long time, then somehow he turned on the light and make the home warm inside as he stayed. I let you to stay, Mr. Uninvited-guest.

Cause when im with you, i feel loved. I feel something that i never had before with anybody else. You melt down the ice, you burn out the hopeless ashes, you pumped up my spirit to do things, even not all the time we feel the happy feelings, we got into the silence mode, we did a lot of misunderstanding, but you have gave a meaning to this life, and im so thankful for that.

I don't know what the future will hold because it's out of my might, but my desire to be with you until the end is so strong, i choose you, and i wanna be with you till then. I don't wanna force things to happen also, I just  hope that Allah will united us, and for the problems to be easily solved. Amin.

You should know that

You know what? I hate commitments. I hate something that attached. Yes and you should know that every time I get closed to somebody, it will end up as just a  friend or not at all.
The problem is that I pushed them away. Sometimes because they turned out to be someone that I don't expected, or it's just me having the feeling that I'm not good enough for anybody.
I'm anxious, have no idea about what I really wanted, easily changed my mind, and not sure if something is really good for me or not. Maybe at one time I like you but the next time I don't and then it turned out that I like you again and want you in my life but then I feel just no.
I admit that it still kinda hard for me to accept other's flaws while I myself still dealing with mine. Yes we all imperfect I know. I'm still working on with this feeling.
Don't do everything in a hurry when it comes to say that you love  me or asking whether I want to be yours or not because I will not sure about everything. Maybe I like you at that time but my head is so complicated I can't even explain it myself. I'm sorry if I hurt anybody. You can't expect me to not to changed. Because my feelings are like season, they changed when it's about the time to.